It’s tax season, and it’s a LOT of people filing as “single”, even though they are actively in “committed” relationships. For some, being in a “committed” relationship is treated the same as being married. Then you have people who will argue, “If we’re living like we’re married then why do we actually need to be married?”. On the other hand, you have some people who say “I’m single until I’m married, because I haven’t went before God to confess my love.” That statement usually brings up the question, should you be monogamous? However, if you can’t file them on your taxes are you truly “single” until you’re married?

His

I believe that if you are dating someone with the intentions of building a future with them, then no you’re not single. You have to live your life in the way that you would like for it to go. For instance, you can’t spend your entire paycheck every two weeks, and then wonder why you have no money saved at the end of the month. Also, you have to ask yourself, if you’re not going to be committed and monogamous, then is it ok for your partner to do the same? Speaking as a man, I don’t believe the average guy would be okay with his woman having this mentality. However, I feel it’s important to have that conversation with your partner. When you date you have set the standards for the type of relationship you want to have, and what boundaries you have in place. The clearer the understanding you have in the beginning, the less headaches that’ll make you want a drink for later.

Hers

Yes. I believe that you’re single, and practicing marriage until marriage. If you haven’t signed those papers at the courthouse, you’re just learning to play the role of husband and wife. However, if the “man of your dreams” doesn’t ask you to share his last name, he was just on the practice squad, and you needed to learn something from him, and that situation to be able to share with your future husband. I believe you must learn something from every relationship you’ve had; the good, the bad, and the ugliest ones. Now ladies, sometimes we must also grow into the woman that the “perfect guy” would want to marry. Some of us women carry TONS of baggage that can ONLY be sorted out through first acknowledging your bags, therapy, and sometimes devoting more time to spiritual growth.

A good friend of mine said she prayed for certain characteristics she wanted her “husband” to have before he appeared in her life. Now she’s living her happily ever after, with someone she didn’t realize was “thee one”. Now while in a relationship I give my all, and stay loyal. I believe that a man that is looking to build a life with you, and change your status from single to married, will make it clear from the start with his words and actions. You know it’s real, by the way it feels. So stop friend zoning the good guys, you may miss out on your 2017 tax exemption!

~ P.O.V. We Speak